Becoming a peaceful parent

‘When you do the right thing, you get the feeling of peace and serenity associated with it. Do it again and again’

Roy T. Bennett

As parents, we do feel agitated when we see our kids doing the things they shouldn’t be. We remain worked up because of the daily errands that never end. The outcome of all this is that we get irked at everything they say even if they are milling around us just to hear how much we love them. That’s natural owing to our tied-up routine but it shouldn’t be our excuse for every action.

We can’t go on being rude to our kids or other members of the family and justifying it by saying how stressed we are. Our strenuous routine cannot forever be used in defence for our distemper.

Stop behaving like an overloaded balloon that pops anytime, startling and annoying everyone around. Take things easy and let go off all your worries. You have to do this, for you and everyone around you.

• Ask for help if you feel overburdened. You are a multitasker, agreed! You are a human too who gets exhausted, isn’t it? Don’t overwork your body to feel stressed out the rest of the day. You are working for your kids but what’s the point of it all if you won’t be in a condition to share their happiness or sorrows!
• Share all your worries and responsibilties with your spouse. Be equal partners in your mission to raise your kids. If you hold up things, they are only going to choke you. Sharing makes life much more smoother and hassle free.
• Acknowledge what your partner does for the kids or the family. Appreciation acts as a great source of motivation to keep up the good work.
• Keep telling your partner that kids are being brought up well and there is nothing wrong with them. Reinforce this statement time and again to let them know they are going in the right direction.
• Give each other surprise breaks from parenthood once or twice a week when you completely take over the job of your kids so your spouse can have time to themselves. It is such a stress buster!
• Take your kids out for mini vacations at nearby places. It will not only make the children happy but would do wonders to the both of you mentally!
• Try to talk to each other about the things other than the kids at least once a day. Discuss life, films, holidays or politics and refrain from topics concerning the children like their school, behaviour etc.
• Reflect on the good things you’ve done or achieved in a day such as making your child smile, helping him successfully finish his homework or cooking a delicious meal that everyone gorged on. This will make you feel accomplished and positive!
• Make a connection with your child. Listen to her, appreciate her and then say what you want. Don’t always be in a rush to order them to do something. Connect with them than correcting them at every chance you get. Be one with them and then gradually come to the point. This would not only make you look at things from their point of view but also help them open up.
• Don’t run after perfections. They make life robotic and monotonous. Leave some room for errors by you or your child. That’s perfectly normal. This is how one learns and grows.

Be at peace with yourself so you can treat everyone around you empathetically. Don’t react as soon as your anger hijacks you. Learn to tame your emotions so you can offer your children a serene atmosphere to grow.